Old man from the sea

old man from the sea

You are fighting an old man from the sea.

This old man, he caught one. He caught marlin by the ton. This old man, he fought two. He fought me and he fought you.

I already lost, so now he's gonna fight you.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

The old man hurls a marlin spear at you. As the marlin pierces your skin you shout, "Stellllaaaaaa!" in pain and frustration.
The seaman whips a dried starfish at you. It embeds itself into your skin painfully. You thank your lucky starfish that you didn't lose an eye.
The man asks if you'd like some sea food. "Sure," you say. He takes a bite of fish, chews for a second, and then opens his mouth wide. Eew! Your stomach churns and roils painfully.

He hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

The crusty old seaman throws a bucket of brine and shrimp at you. Following the old adage, "Sea monkey, monkey do," you catch the bucket and throw it back at him.
The old man hurls a marlinspike at you, but since you're not made of rope the small metal needle just bounces off harmlessly.
He hurls a dried starfish at you, but it misses by a mile. You chuckle, but the old man says, "You don't understand. I coulda had bass. I coulda been a conger-eel. I coulda been a sombre, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it."

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 63-103 chips.

You gain 82 experience.

You got an item: bag of throwing starfish (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: harbor pearl (Unspecified Drop rate)

Known resistances/weaknesses

Unspecified

The foe's name references Ernest Hemingway's novella The Old Man and the Sea.
The description is based on the nursery rhyme This Old Man.
A marlin (1st hit message) is a fish also known as a spearfish. A marlinspike (2nd miss message) is a tool used in ropework.
The old adage mentioned in the first miss message is of course "Monkey see, monkey do."
The third miss message is a play on a quote from the movie On the Waterfront: "You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it."