Road-enraged bike courier

road-enraged bike courier

You are fighting a road-enraged bike courier.

Right in front of you a bike courier cuts off a car and nearly has an accident. At the last second the bicyclist veers away and comes to a stop directly in front of you. "You're in my way," she growls, and in a fit of irrationality charges you.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

She does an endo and then swings her bike around, smacking you in the face with the rear tire.
She runs you down, much like she implied she would.
She throws her courier bag at you. What's she got in there? Buckles?

She hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! She hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

She does an endo and a bunch of other neat tricks. You applaud politely.
She tries to run you down, but you expertly dodge. Good job!
She almost throws her courier bag at you, but then remember she needs to deliver that.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! She takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 6-10 chips.

You gain 5 experience.

You got an item: bike helmet (15.7 ± 2.7%)
You got an item: bicycle (5 ± 1.6%)
You got an item: biker boots (9.7 ± 2.2%)
You got an item: gears (24.7 ± 3.2%)