Difference between revisions of "Firebird College at Philbin"

Revision as of 02:41, 25 August 2009

Far outside of Twilight lies the little town of Philbin, nearly lost in the desert. Their one claim to fame is a booming distance-learning program, supported by a single physical office building that offers a few classes to the locals. Their cutsey logo features a vaguely familiar phoenix delivering a diploma.

You look over the college's course catalog. Nothing really interests you, but your understudy, always ready to learn, seems curious about the offerings.

Go back to Out in the Desert

Back to the main map.

Messages

• Flea Market Smarts:

It turns out that flea market smarts mostly requires having several large volumes of different types of items and their market value. Large volumes written and self-published by the instructor of the class, funny enough. Still, your sidekick ought to have a good eye for valuables, as long as they keep the books around.

• Documentary Arts:

Most of the cost of this class comes from needing to buy the equipment: camera, film, lots of batteries. The class itself boils down to "record a lot of stuff and watch the highlights."

• Mimicry :

After just a few short classes your understudy is such an accomplished mimic they've got you saying "Stop doing that! I don't act like that!" at a fifth-degree level of annoyance.

• Self Defense:

Your sidekick studies self defense for a while. Turns out most of the trick is putting your pointy bits (knees, elbows, and the like) into their tender bits (groins, eyes, and the like).

• Karate:

Your understudy picks up the karate lessons quickly. Class graduation involves catching a fly with chopsticks, after which the instructor says there is no more to learn.

• Jujitsu:

All your understudy says after the last session is, "Whoah, I know kung fu." It's not technically accurate, but who's going to argue with a jujitsu expert?

• Massage Therapy:

Your understudy learns to do things with elbows and fingertips that can tenderize even your heroic muscles.

• Selecting no class:

You seem to be trying to buy a skill that you already have.

• After all classes have been taken:

Your understudy has already learned all of the classes that the college has to offer.

References

• Since Phoenix is also known as the firebird, "Firebird College" is probably a reference to the University of Phoenix, which has a distance learning program with a significant net presence.
• "catching a fly with chopsticks" refers to a scene from The Karate Kid.
• "I know kung fu" is most likely a quote from The Matrix.