Difference between revisions of "Glove Slap, Baby"

Revision as of 20:35, 18 June 2009

You're trying to cross a small wooden bridge that leads to the other side of the park when a looming figure dressed in black armor steps up and bars your way. In a booming voice (must be good acoustics in his helmet) he shouts, "None shall pass!"

"Yeah, yeah," you say, "I've seen that movie too. Now let's step aside shall we so that I can stop playing games and start doing my, well, it's not a job, exactly, but whatever."

The armored figure sighs dramatically. "Fine, be that way. I challenge you to a duel of honor, scoundrel!" he says and throws down one of his gauntlets at your feet. Then he puts on a frankly frightening display of weapons prowess by twirling his blade through an array of lightning-swift manuevers. Not only is this guy completly nutzoid, but he looks pretty skilled, too. What's your choice?

Options:

• Take up the challenge
  
• Cheat like the dickens
  
• Run for your life
  

Results

If you chose Take up the challenge:

Combat!
Fight a Pitch-black knight

• This moves your reputation to be more Honorable.

If you chose Cheat like the dickens:

Cheater, Cheater, Pants on .... uh ... Defeater?
"None shall pass!" the knight shouts again.

"None shall fail!" you reply.

"Huh?"

"Look, it's a rabbit!" you shout, pointing off to the side.

"Oh no! Where?" The knight turns, weapon trembling in his grasp.

While his back is turned, you dash up behind him and give him a tremendous push. The clatter of armor as he falls to the ground is as satisfying as it is deafening. Before he can even begin to attempt to get up, you're across the bridge and striding away. His cries of "No fair!" fade into the night nearly as quickly as any qualms of conscience you might have over cheating.

You gain 50 experience.

• This moves your reputation to be less Honorable.

If you chose Run for your life:

Run Away!
Shouting "Run away!" like the phrase is going out of style, you bravely turn your tail and flee. And by "bravely" I mean cravenly, of course. At least the knight's armor guarantees that he won't be able to catch you.

• Does not consume time

Location(s)

• Guild for Imaginative Metachronism
  

References

• 'Glove slap, baby' refers to the The Simpsons episode E-I-E-I-D'oh, in which "Glove Slap" appears in the tune of the B-52's Love Shack.
• To "throw down one's gauntlet (French: 'little glove')" is to challenge someone, originating from mediaeval practice.
• The movie referred to is Monty Python and the Holy Grail, specifically the Black Knight scene.
• The knight's fear of rabbits is due to the Rabbit of Caerbannog.
• 'Cheater, Cheater, Pants on .... uh ... Defeater?' alludes to the Jump-rope rhyme 'Liar, liar, pants on fire.'