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When all else fails ... uh, you can, too?
After you punch the orange F with a virtual hand, a progress bar appears along with the words "Debugger loading." A blue line slowly begins filling a white box, while a timer underneath estimates that it will take 999,999,999 minutes. But in no more than the time it takes for you to roll your eyes it jumps to 99% complete, and the estimate jumps down to 2 seconds. Naturally, it takes a full minute for those "two seconds" to pass. Then the bar kicks into motion ... sliding backwards of all things. Eventually it does kick forward again, shooting to the end and then beyond the bounds of the white box, zipping somewhere far off screen.
Moments later the whole mess is replaced by the image of some sort of futuristic pub--half Mos Eisley cantina and half Quark's, with a burble of wandering puppets and Ferengi in the background. Gee, wonder where the programmers got their inspiration? A vaguely familiar human bartender leans up against the counter and addresses you. "Welcome to The Progress Bar. Looks like you could use a nice tall glass of debugging. What's your order?"
Confusing. The bartender looks at you expectantly. Apparently he's a quirky metaphor for the computer interface, and you're supposed to tell him what you want to do. Knowing the programmers, it probably only recognizes one word commands.
| Ask for help |
Location(s)
Notes
- Occurs when you choose "Fail" on Shall We Play A Game? (A.R.F.)
- The result depends on the word you enter:
| Word | Result |
|---|---|
| bug, debug, virus, trojan, worm | You plug in the debugging data, and are brought directly to the nearest bug. Anatolian mule or Silk Worm or D-bug |
| gin, rm | Sorry, but the cards subroutine is broken. How about a nice drink instead?
After a little more fiddling you get some part of the game working and manage to explore for a little while. You gain 17-19 XP. |
| load | |
| drink | |
| beer | |
| run | |
| quit | |
| kill | |
| download | |
| delete | |
| reboot | |
| boolean | |
| word | |
| ping | |
| megahertz | |
| defrag | |
| floppy | |
| ssh | |
| rm | |
| cd | |
| ls | |
| remove | |
| echo | |
| scan | |
| grep | |
| sudo | |
| dir | |
| file | |
| zip | |
| false | |
| exe | |
| Anything else | The computer just asks Sorry? and sits there until you give up.
After a little more fiddling you get some part of the game working and manage to explore for a little while. You gain 21 XP. |
