Tarantula gargantua

tarantula gargantua

You are fighting a tarantula gargantua.

This is a gargantuan tarantulan. No! No! I mean a gargantua tarantua. Dear me, I'm not certain quite that even now I've got it right. Howe'er it is, you don't like the fangs shown by that tarantuangs. The more he leaps and bites, the scarier grows the tarantuites. I fear I'd better drop the description of superhero and tarantuiption.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

• He leaps at you and pounces, then lands on you and bounces. It cracks a rib and bends your spine, so painful that tarantuine.
• The spider tramples you like a pack of elephants. No, wait, I mean ... actually, I do mean elephants.
• He bites you in the lights. No, wait. I mean he begs you in the legs. It really hurts.

It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

• The spider whiffles through the tulgy desert, and burbles as it comes. No, wait, that's an entirely different bit of nonsense. The tarantula pauses to reorient itself.
• A giant mutant housefly buzzes past, and the tarantula pounces on it instead of you. The louder buzzes the giant fly, the faster the spider sucks it dry.
• You get yourself entangled in the spider web. The harder you try to get yourself free, the more quickly you actually get free. You try really hard, and get free quickly.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 66 experience.

You got an item: webbed sand (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: webbed sand (Unspecified Drop rate)

Known resistances/weaknesses

Unspecified
Former resistances were Verified to have no resistances or weaknesses., remember to remove this information from the page when resistances are spaded.

Locations

• outskirts of Area 54
  

References

• The entire foe's text is written in the style of Ogden Nash.
• Except the first miss message, which is an almost direct quote from Lewis Carrol's Jabberwocky, which is an entirely different bit of nonsense.