Queen ZOM-I

queen ZOM-I

You are fighting queen ZOM-I.

It turns out, with sufficiently advanced cybernetics, "the queen is dead, long live the queen" might have a totally different meaning than the one you're used to.

However, ZOM-I doesn't seem particularly interested in discussing the finer points of succession law... as long as it's not gavelkind. Screw gavelkind.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

• The queen reveals a decorated orb from her throne, pulls out the pin, and throws it at you. Wait, pin? damage + (fire) damage
• The queen shouts "off with your head!" so loudly it actually cuts you. Yeah, I don't know how it works either. Probably a royalty thing. damage + (sonic) damage
• After a fierce exchange of blows, you get a little blue blood on you. That stuff is cold. (ice) damage

She hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! She hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

• The queen reveals a decorated orb from her throne and tries to figure out the instructions. But she counts to five and it doesn't seem to work at all.
• The queen shouts "off with your head," but you're reluctant to comply.
• After a fierce exchange of blows, you get a little blue blood on you. Is she a horseshoe crab or something?

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! She takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 150 experience.

You got an item: hook on a string (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: chalkboard (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: hinged mallet (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: ZOM orb (Unspecified Drop rate)

Known resistances/weaknesses

Unspecified

Locations

• Backstage
  

Notes

• Sometimes, at the end of a round of combat:

A weight drops in the distance. You don't pay it much attention until the rope it's attached to loops around your foot and drags you away from your opponent.

foe becomes "Distant"

or, if wielding a melee weapon

A weight drops in the distance. You don't pay it much attention until the rope it's attached to loops around your foot and drags you away from your opponent. That'll make it pretty hard to use your <melee weapon>.

foe becomes "Distant"

• If the foe is "Distant", your next melee attack is replaced by:

You rush up, closing the distance with your opponent.

References

• The foe's image is based on Queen Elizabeth I of England.
• The description mentions gavelkind, a complicated set of customary laws concerning inheritances.
• The first hit and miss messages refer to the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
• The second hit and miss messages refer to the Red Queen in Through the Looking-Glass.
• As mentioned in the third miss message, horseshoe crabs have blue blood.