Canon Quagmire
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| Canon Quagmire |
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You are fighting Canon Quagmire.
Canon was a nomad out in this desert until he stumbled upon a source of massive power which gave him the ability to say absolutely anything and have people believe it. He considered a career in politics before settling on marketing. This mysterious training camp deal is just his weekend gig.
Your opponent attacks ...
Hit messages:
- He grins at you and says, "You want to punch yourself." Oddly enough, you do!
- He vanishes from sight, only to appear behind you where he sucker punches you.
- He floats up in the air and flies around in circles. The resulting dust storm is surprisingly painful.
He hits you for X damage.
Critical hit message:
Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.
Miss messages:
- He grins at you and says, "You want to punch yourself." You give yourself a shot in the arm and feel encouraged.
- He vanishes from sight, but you can still see a blurry outline so you can dodge his predatory assault.
- He floats up in the air and flies around in circles. You patiently wait for him to resume fighting.
Fumble messages:
Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.
Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!
You gain 150 experience.
You got an item: The Lieforce 
(Guaranteed Drop)
You take some additional suspicious items from the brute.
- If fought as the Master of Trainees:
You got an item: red cape 
You got an item: blue choker 
- If fought as the Master of Veterans:
You got an item: greased bowling shoes 
You got an item: pointininis 
- If fought as the Head Trainer:
You got an item: portable hole 
You got an item: donut hole 
Known resistances/weaknesses
Immune to sonic damage.
Locations
References
- This boss is based on Ganondorf Dragmire, the villain of the Legend of Zelda series (who did in fact live as a desert nomad).