Casino elite guard
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You are fighting a casino elite guard.
This guard is bigger, tougher, and meaner than the average casino guard. And he's got better hair, but that's not important right now.
Your opponent attacks ...
Hit messages:
- He shoots the taser at you, but you skillfully dodge the wires. Unruffled, he clubs you with the heavy base of the gun.
- The two of you act out the lyrics of the Scorpions' Tase me, plase me. Too late you realize that should have been tease/please instead. (electric) damage
- The guard makes an athletic diving roll, after which he comes up and zaps you with his taser. Better turn up your radio because it looks like you're dealing with a skilled shock jock here! damage+ (electric) damage
He hits you for X damage.
Critical hit message:
Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.
Miss messages:
- He accidentally shoots himself in the foot with the taser, but he's wearing thick-soled shoes, so nothing happens.
- You stare intently at the guard, until you swear you can hear his heartbeat. He begins to sweat and then collapses. But when the ambulance comes you get in with him and wait until he feels better.
- It's his turn, but instead of doing anything he just shakes his head and mutters something to himself that sounds a bit like, "... picked the wrong week to stop beating up intruders."
Fumble messages:
Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.
Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!
You gain 40-60 chips.
You gain 50 experience.
You got an item: taser 
(23.4 ± 3.2%)
You got an item: security slacks 
(16.5 ± 2.8%)
Known resistances/weaknesses
50% resistant to electric damage.
100% weak to acid damage.
Locations
references
- The second hit message refers to the Scorpions' song "Tease Me, Please Me."
- The third miss message probably refers to the movie Airplane! in which the line "looks like I picked the wrong week" is repeated several times.
- A shock jock is a radio broadcaster who attracts attention using humor that a significant portion of the listening audience may find offensive.