Cuckoo clockmaker

cuckoo clockmaker

You are fighting a cuckoo clockmaker.

No, this foe doesn't make cuckoo clocks. She's a regular clockmaker who's gone mad repairing all this crazy machinery.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

You're not sure why all the clocks are set to right now, but they go off in a maddening cacophony. (sonic) damage
The ticking... THE TICKING! (psychic) damage
She pulls out her tools and tries to install a cuckoo clock in your chest. It's more unpleasant than it sounds.

She hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! She hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

You're not sure when all the clocks are set to, but it apparently isn't right now because they're remaining silent.
The clocks tick obnoxiously, but you're too busy fighting to obsess over it.
She politely asks for permission to install a cuckoo clock in your chest to transform you into a new clock-themed villain under her control. Surprisingly, she drops the request once you refuse.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! She takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain ?-115-? chips.