Mercilessly menacing mastodon

mercilessly menacing mastodon

You are fighting a mercilessly menacing mastodon.

This giant mastodon was frozen in ice until it was thawed out a few years ago. Like the caveman it was frozen next to, this modern world frightened and confused it. Unlike that caveman, it didn't become an attorney. Instead, it went on a rampage and ended up here at the ranch.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

It slaps you silly with its trunk, complete with "boppity-boppity" sound effects.
Being considerably larger than you, it doesn't take much effort to stomp you. Needless to say, it hurts (so why did I say it?).
It wraps its trunk around you and repeatedly stabs you against its massive tusks. Youch!

It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

It slaps you silly with its trunk, but you were already pretty silly, so you don't really notice.
Being considerably smaller than it, you easily dodge as it tries to stomp you.
It tries to wrap its trunk around you, but you point out that you have your own luggage, and don't need its.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 116 experience.

You got an item: gossamer glass goblet (24.2 ± 3.2%)
You got an item: luxurious leather lanyard (24.5 ± 3.2%)
You got an item: random raggedy rod (10.1 ± 2.2%)