Difference between revisions of "I'm All Locked Up (with key card)"

Latest revision as of 11:41, 9 June 2012

Deep in the bowels of Livia la Frostheim's base, you find yourself facing a massive door with a large sign next to it that says: "WARNING: Secret Laboratory. DO NOT ENTER." You were never one to pay attention to the signage from your average super villainess, and you're not about to start now.

Unfortunately, the door is really secure. Really, really secure. Luckily, you have the Frostheim Key Card. Knowing your superhero tendencies, you can only assume that the showdown with Livia is going to lead to the complete annihilation of her underwater base. Would you like to use the card now?

Options:

• Nah, let's wait a bit
  
• Yes, let's end this
  

Results

If you chose Nah, let's wait a bit:

Nah...
You decide you aren't quite ready for this, so you pocket the card and wander off. Maybe next time.

If you chose Yes, let's end this:

Viva Livia!
You're able and you're ready. With a cocky grin, you slide the Frostheim key card through the slot...

...which causes the floor to open up under your feet. And things were going so well until now...

The long slide would probably be pretty awesome in a theme park, your back yard (if your apartment had one), or really, anywhere but in the depths of an evil villainess's underwater base. You try really hard to yell "whee!" as you slide down it, but you're pretty sure what you're yelling wouldn't be allowed on prime-time television.

Eventually, the slide deposits you onto a large cushion, like some kind ^[sic] kid's pizza place party room. Unlike a kid's pizza place party room, you're immediately jumped by dozens of goons, thugs, and faceless minions who steal all your stuff and strap you down on a metal table.

"Oh, come on," you shout, "Stealing equipment is just a lazy way to artificially inflate a level's difficulty!" You struggle against the metal bonds, trying to figure a way out while also gazing longingly at your equipment, all in a neat bundle, not one hundred feet away.

You continue to struggle, trying desperately to slip from the cuffs around your wrists when one of the doors hisses open. The woman who walks through can only be Livia la Frostheim; nobody else would be back-lit quite that way, or get the cool dry-ice fog effects.

The word "statuesque" gets bandied about quite a bit in the superhero/supervillain world, but Livia really earns the appellation. She's tall, lovely, and evil. She wears an almost scandalously tight dress with a fur shoal^[sic] around her neck, which really doesn't do much for her modesty. Her long blond hair has just a hint of white running through it. The smooth and pale, almost like porcelain, skin of her face is only marred by her blood-red lips which are in a condescending sneer, a bloody fracture across her perfect face. As expected, her eyes are a pale ice-blue, but what's not expected is the power and anger that crackles behind them. You start to wonder about that when you notice a small pendant around her neck: it's a tiny bottle with an even smaller icicle floating inside; a talisman!

"So, <player>, you've decided to invade my sanctum," her voice isn't just figuratively cool, but literally as well: you can see her breath and feel the temperature of the room drop just a little. It's a neat effect, but also kind of scary.

"I can't let your lackeys destroy the oil rig, Livia!"

Her sneer deepens as she regards you, "You are hardly in a place to issue such proclamations, hero. You are helpless, and those fools topside will do as I tell them." She cackles softly, "They never were horribly bright."

"I was wondering about that, actually... how'd you get a bunch of neo-hippies to go along with creating an ecological disaster? I mean, the underwater base is cool and all, but that doesn't make a lick of sense."

"Simple, really," her voice drops a little softer, and her eyes turn a little more hateful as she condescends even further, "Lesser of two evils. I convinced them that that shadow of a crime boss The Mick was actually the owner of the rig, that he controlled it through shadow organizations, and that after he extracted all the oil, he would use that hole to plant an earth-cracking nuclear bomb that he would use to hold the planet ransom."

You blink several times, "You're kidding right? That's the stupidest master plan I've ever heard!"

To your surprise, she actually looks a little hurt, "Hey, I thought it was pretty good, and they believed me. Besides, everything would have worked if you had stayed up there and finished the job, you know."

"What do you mean? You wanted me to beat up Pax Verde?"

"Of course, you ridiculous hero! The whole point was to tie you to The Mick! He actually does own a share in the rig, and I was going ^[sic] make everyone think you were his personal wet works agent. But you just had to find my hideout. Do you have any idea how frustrating this is?"

You just stare at her for a few moments, unable to believe that you dodged one trap only to walk into another. To say nothing of the fact that you were almost set up and disgraced. Wow. For all her monologueing^[sic], Livia's pretty devious. And if The Mick is worse (which is what you've heard), you'll really need to be on your toes.

Assuming, of course, that you get out of here.

"And now," she continues, "It looks like I have to dispose of you. The end effect is roughly the same, but character assassination is so much more fun than plain old everyday assassination." She shrugs her delicate shoulders and sashays over to a control panel, throwing a few switches and pulling a few other ones. She grins and waves as she walks out of the room, "Enjoy your deep freeze... in a few minutes you'll be frozen solid and I can add you to my collection."

The room's temperature starts to drop almost instantly, and soon it's too cold to even bother with a joke about what an ice princess she is. You're kind of ticked that she didn't give you a chance to ask if she expected you to talk, though. Darn this new generation of evil villains; no respect for the classics.

You shiver as the temperature drops more and more, almost able to feel your blood getting sluggish. You figure that you better come up with something quick or else you'll be dead. It's about that time that you realize the flaw in Livia's little death trap here. The metal cuffs, having been frozen and thawed numerous times are really quite brittle by now, and this last freeze is just too much for them. With a cry of triumph, you break free from the restraints and hop off the table.

First things first, you grab all your equipment. While you felt naked without it, you find it's not especially helpful at keeping you warm right now, so you look at the panel that Livia used.

It's written in Swedish.

Well, crud. You don't speak Swedish.

Figuring that you don't really have anything to lose, you start throwing switches at random, hoping that you stumble into something helpful. Or at least something that doesn't involve you freezing to death. You keep throwing and pulling switches until a loud klaxon goes off and the screen flashes in big, red, angry letters "FÖRÖDELSE". Uh-huh. That doesn't look good.

The doors to the room you're in fly open and you see people running around like mad, trying to escape. It seems you've triggered some kind of self-destruct mechanism. A self-destruct mechanism from IKEA, no less. Wonder if she had to build it herself. Oh, right... the explosion. Carrying on:

Several panels along the wall start to slide up, revealing escape pods. Without even wasting a second on wondering about the convenience of that, you jump into the nearest one and blast off, rocketing out of the bay just as the base explodes dramatically.

Your pod slowly drifts down, depositing you just outside the University. You dust yourself off and figure you might as well update Susan, now that you're here.

talk to Susan

You gain 500 XP.

Location(s)

• Underwater Base
  

Notes

• Part of the Go Fish, Again quest.
• Once you choose "Yes, let's end this", locks Underwater Base and becomes a one time adventure.
• Choosing "Nah, let's wait a bit" does not cost time.
• "Förödelse" is the Swedish word for "havoc" or "mayhem".

References

• A hero asking if the villain expects him to talk is a reference to the James Bond movie Goldfinger.