Star-crossed lovers
 
 | 
| star-crossed lovers | 
|---|
You are fighting star-crossed lovers.
These star-crossed lovers desire each other so badly they don't care if they ruin the lives of everyone else around them in the pursuit of ill-fated love. Teenagers can be so selfish sometimes.
Your opponent attacks ...
Hit messages:
- The two gaze deeply into each other's eyes. Then they start making out frantically. Your stomach churns, and you feel sick.
 - The teen male sticks you with his rose. Did I say rose? I meant sword. Though that which we call a sword by any other name would hurt as much.
 - Parting is such sweet sorrow. Especially when it's you being parted from some of your blood. But that's exactly what the teens take away from you.
 
It hits you for X damage.
Critical hit message:
Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.
Miss messages:
- Instead of attacking you, they just take turns playing "loves me, loves me not" with some flower petals. Strangely, it ends on "loves me" every time.
 - The lovers gaze deeply into each other's eyes. Apparently they've forgotten that you even exist.
 - One of the lovers accidentally eats some poison and collapses, and the other sticks a knife in his gut out of grief. But it turns out the poison was a sleeping pill and the knife had a retractable blade. Both of the lovers get up and laugh, but neither gets around to attacking you.
 
Fumble messages:
Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.
Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!
You gain 97 experience.
You got an item: bodice 
 (10.3 ± 0.8%)
You got an item: lover's locket, right half 
 (8%)
You got an item: sleeping draught 
 (5%)
You got an item: peanut butter couplet 
 (Unspecified Drop rate)
Known resistances/weaknesses
50% resistant to sonic damage.
50% weak to ice damage.
Locations
References
Romeo and Juliet, from William Shakespeare's tragedy of the same name, are the most famous star-crossed lovers.
