Radio Supernova
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It's not surprising to see a wall of speakers at a Hero Dash event. After all, even heroes need to hear their jams.
But it is a little surprising to hear them from blocks away and blaring what sounds like the contents of a newspaper's crank pile. Or, you know, their comment section if they're all newfangled.
Anyway, it's a auditory and psychological horror that is only nominally legal because of all the disclaimers you signed before starting the Dash.
- If you've selected Pump up your volume but not Argue back:
You've managed to become N decibels louder than the wall of speakers.
- If you've selected Argue back but not Pump up your volume:
You've managed to become M Urkels more annoying than the wall of speakers.
- If you've selected Pump up your volume and Argue back:
You've managed to become N decibels louder and M Urkels more annoying than the wall of speakers.
Options:
- Pump up your volume
- Argue back
- Listen in
- Maybe later
| Dash |
Results
If you chose Pump up your volume:
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Pump Up Your Volume
- If you have a megaphone equipped:
You crank your megaphone and start fighting back the crush of sound with even more sound... I'm sure that works somehow.
- Become an additional 1 decibel louder
- Otherwise:
You shout as loud as you can, fighting back the crush of sound with more sound of your own... I'm sure that works somehow.
- followed by:
- If you know Shock Grenade:
With a shock grenade, you drown out the worst of the shouting. Or maybe you just deafened yourself. Either way's probably a win at this point.
- Become 3 decibels louder
- Otherwise:
You're not sure whether to be sad or glad. You're just not cut out to be a super shockjock.
- Become 1 decibel louder
If you chose Argue back:
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Shouting into the Void
You know what they say: "shout long enough into the void and, someday, the void will shout back into you." Maybe if you get them angry enough, they'll finally stop.
- If you have more than +50 foe toughness
You're not sure if it's your arguments or your very existence, but even the loudspeakers seem to be angry at you, sputtering and crackling in barely-contained rage.
- Become 3 Urkels more annoying
- If you have at least +10 but less than +50 foe toughness
The good news is, you're making them plenty angry. The bad news is, of course, you're still arguing with loudspeakers.
- Become 2 Urkels more annoying
- Otherwise:
You argue with the loudspeakers, but it mostly just gets you worked out. Maybe it's time for a nice chamomile tea.
- Become 1 Urkel more annoying
If you chose Listen in:
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The Way the News Goes
You make your way into the dark heart of the news, surrounded by endless booming voices and annoying crosstalk.
The shouting never seems to stop, harming your ears for X damage and your mind for Y damage.
- If you are defeated:
But that's all you have in you.
- If this is the first completed trial of the Dash:
The booth right after the event offers you a drink.
You got an item: Water Drinkadile 
- or
You got an item: Garlic Drinkadile
- or
You got an item: Lavender Drinkadile
- If this is the second completed trial of the Dash:
The booth right after the event offers you some refreshment.
You got an item: Hero Dash nuts 
- or
You got an item: Hero Dash licorice 
- or
You got an item: Hero Dash expresso 
- If this is the third completed trial of the Dash:
You've finished today's Hero Dash in <amount of time taken>. Congratulations!
If you chose Maybe later:
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Fight Now, Dash Later
No time for dashing right now, you've got crime to fight!
- Does not consume time
Location(s)
Notes
- X is ?
- Y is ?
References
- The first choice refers to the song "Pump Up the Volume".
- The unit of annoyance refers to the character Steve Urkel in Family Matters.
- The second choice contains a reference to a quote by Friedrich Nietzsche: "And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you."
- The third choice refers to the song "The Way the News Goes" by Periphery.
