Office hoplite
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| office hoplite |
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You are fighting an office hoplite.
An ancient warrior from corporate antiquity, the office hoplite fights side-by-side with his fellow hoplites in a tightly-knit phalanx formation. I'd tell you more, but it's all Greek to me.
Your opponent attacks ...
Hit messages:
- You're momentarily blinded by the light reflecting off Leon Idas's abs and the hoplite takes advantage of the momentary distraction to stab you.
- The hoplite runs at you in slow motion. You avoid him easily, but it turns out it was a clever ruse for the hoplite behind him to stab you with his spear.
- The hoplite stabs you with his sword. Hey, sometimes you've gotta go with the classics.
He hits you for X damage.
Critical hit message:
Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.
Miss messages:
- The hoplite swings at you, but is momentarily blinded by the light reflecting off Leon Idas's abs.
- The hoplite runs at you in slow motion. You step aside.
- The hoplite tries to stab you with his beard. Who does he think he is, a barbazu?
Fumble messages:
Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.
Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!
You gain 70-175 chips.
You gain 123 experience.
You got an item: hoplon 
(19.7 ± 3.4%)
You got an item: hoplite sword 
(12.2 ± 2.8%)
With at least 2 Madness:
The next hoplite in line steps back. "I don't care what that guy said, you're totally Spartan."
Known resistances/weaknesses
Verified to have no resistances or weaknesses.
Locations
Notes
- deja voodoo doll does not work on this foe.
- Defeat seven of them to open Betrayed By the One He Mocked.
References
- Based on hoplite. The hit and miss messages refer to the depiction of Spartan hoplites in the movie 300.
- "It's all Greek to me" is a reference to a line from William Shakespeare's Julius Caesar.
- The third miss message refers to the barbazu, a type of devil in Dungeons & Dragons which can attack with its beard.
