Counsel Harry

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counsel Harry

You are fighting counsel Harry.

This is a consig-, uh, consool-, er, config- ... well, you're not quite sure what that word is. But he gives counsel to the boss and you're pretty sure his name is Harry.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

  • Harry holds up an index finger. "The secret of life is to pick one thing and do it well." Then he pokes you in the eye with the finger. "That's my one thing," he explains.
  • He charges you and lands a blow with a precision that's absolutely "maaahvellous." Marvelously painful, to be sure.
  • He pulls out a little golden statuette and clubs you with it. Man, this guy's a real grouch.

He hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

  • Harry prepares to attack, but gets distracted by a blonde girl trying to order a salad. You wouldn't think that's such a big deal, but trust me, this time it's very distracting.
  • He starts telling the story of some city he went to long ago, where he found true love. But he's forgotten which city it was, when he was there, and even who he was in love with at the time, so it's not much of a story. There may have been some basketball in there somewhere, but you've forgotten the details, too.
  • His attack is interrupted by a middle-aged woman requesting an autograph. "I just loved you in Coccoon[sic]," she says. "Hey, that wasn't me!" he replies, and shoos her off.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

Chips-white.gif You gain 40-68 chips.

You gain 48 experience.

You got an item: double half large Double-half-large.gif (Guaranteed Drop)
You got an item: double half large Double-half-large.gif (Guaranteed Drop)

Known resistances/weaknesses

50% resistant to ice damage.
50% weak to fire damage.




  • The word that "you're not quite sure" about is consigliere. It means a member of a criminal organization or syndicate who serves as an adviser to the leader.
  • The image is Billy Crystal, who starred in the films Analyze This and Analyze That, providing psychiatric care and counseling to a mob boss. There are several other references to Billy Crystal:
    • The name "Harry" might refer to two films he played in: When Harry Met Sally and Deconstructing Harry;
    • The first hit message is an interesting interpretation of a dialog from City Slickers.
    • The second hit message refers to a recurring sketch he did in Saturday Night Live, a smarmy talk show host whose catch phrase was "You look... mahvelous!."
    • The "little golden statuette" in the third hit message is the Academy Award, the ceremony of which was hosted by him several times.
    • The first miss message refers to the faked orgasm scene in When Harry Met Sally.
    • The second miss message refers to the movie Forget Paris in which he played a basketball referee that finds true love in Paris.
  • The third miss message refers to the movie Cocoon, in which Billy Crystal didn't play.