Distempered catfish

distempered catfish

You are fighting a distempered catfish.

This is a very ill-tempered catfish, because it's contracted feline distemper.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

The quills on one of its fins scratches you, giving you cat scratch fever. Even though you're a hero, it makes you cry, cry.
The catfish swims up to you, purring loudly and rubbing against your ankles. You reach out to pet the nice kitty fish and it chomps down hard on your fingers. Ow! Bad kitty fish!
You try to play your cards right as the fish approaches, but you don't have any aces up your sleeve, so it gets to go fish. And boy does it go!

It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

You whip out a small grill and some beer batter and get ready for a fish fry, scaring the catfish away.
The catfish's attack is delayed when it--ick!--coughs up a giant hairball.
It tries to bite you, but only succeeds in tickling you with its whiskers.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 63 experience.

You got an item: pearl of wisdom (80%)
You got an item: fish whiskas (18.8 ± 2.1%)
You got an item: watercress (16.7 ± 2.8%)

Known resistances/weaknesses

100% weak to fire damage. 50% resistant to ice damage.

Although it is an animal, it cannot be Tamed. Ryme said this is because of the distemper.

In reality, Feline distemper does not cause ill-temper. It is typically associated with depression and lethargy. And no, it usually does not affect catfish.
The first hit messages is a reference to the song "Cat Scratch Fever" by Ted Nugent.
The third hit message refers to the card game Go Fish.