Pointy-haired executive

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pointy-haired executive

You are fighting a pointy-haired executive.

Well, this is an unusual hair style. He claims it's all the rage in Remulak (a small town in France), but you're more than a little suspicious. The next thing you know, he's throwing down to engage in "antagonistic pugilistic activities".
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

  • He sips his coffee and informs you that you'll have to come in on Sunday. Then he throws the coffee in your face. Yeah...
  • He demands to know why you aren't working, pointing out that you're supposed to work 178 hours a week. The stupidity is shocking. (electric) damage
  • He starts yelling in a loud, monotone and nasally voice. You don't know what he's saying, you just want him to stop.



He hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.



Miss messages:

  • He sips his coffee and starts to inform you that you'll have to come in on Sunday, but you just walk away, not caring in the slightest.
  • He demands to know why you aren't working, but is interrupted by a female engineer yelling about her "fist of death".
  • He starts yelling at you, but you've seen Full Metal Jacket, and this guy is no R. Lee Ermey.



Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.


Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!


You gain 99-164 chips.

You gain 131 experience.

You got an item: employee manual (5.3 ± 1.7%)
You got an item: power tie (20.9 ± 3%)
You got an item: staff of meeting (24.1 ± 3.2%)
You got an item: office trebuchet (22.4 ± 3.1%)





Known resistances/weaknesses

Immune to psychic damage.
50% weak to sonic damage.


Locations

References

  • Based on the pointy-haired boss from the Dilbert comic strip. This is also hinted by the image name "phb", which is a common abbreviation. The Dilbert strip is also hinted by several of the hit and miss messages.
    • For example, the female engineer with a "fist of death" in the second miss message refers to Alice.
  • The third miss message refers to actor (and former Marine drill instructor) R. Lee Ermey and specifically to his role in the movie Full Metal Jacket.
  • The mention of "Remulak" refers to the Coneheads, a comedy sketch later converted into a film.
  • The first hit and miss messages reference the character Bill Lumbergh from the movie Office Space.