The Bit Player 7
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For what feels like the fiftieth time, the Bit Player tracks you down while you're trying to investigate more serious crimes. This time the Player isn't carrying much, but his understudy is loaded down with twice as much gear. You feel a small twinge of sympathy for the understudy. You're not sure how anyone can put up with this guy for long.
- Bassanio
- Benvolio
- Beowulf
- Desdemona
- Gawaine
- Juliet
- Katherina
- Lady Capulet
- Mercutio
- Oberon
- Othello
- Petruchio
- Portia
- Titania
- Tybalt
- Robin Hood
- Romeo
Options:
- Beowulf, Gawaine, or Robin Hood
- Correct roles
- Incorrect roles
- No role
| State your character |
Results
If you chose Beowulf, Gawaine, or Robin Hood:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The Bit Player sputters at your suggestion. "An outrage! Have you no knowledge of the Bard at all? That's not even a Shakespearean role, you ignorant clod!" The Bit Player proceeds to give his best effort to beating some sense into you.
- When you have already made two such choices:
- As the Bit Player strides off after trouncing you for your third pathetic guess, you realize that he left a can of unopened beverage behind. Must have been too busy slinging your butt all over the place to remember to pick it up afterwards. You play a short and very sweet game of finders keepers.
- You got an item: Scalpel energy drink
You lose Half your Max HP.
If you chose Correct roles:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The bit player smiles and nods, then claps you on the back. "Ah, such a role! One day I should be so lucky to play that part! Until then, lay on Macduff!" Whatever that means, it must be good, because the good-humored Bit Player visibly relaxes, then rushes off to some curtain call alert that you can't seem to detect.
Only after he's gone do you notice he's dropped a piece of parchment.
If you don't have a full-time sidekick yet:
As you're picking up the scrap of paper, you hear someone clear their throat. When you look up you find the understudy standing there, empty handed. "I was wondering, see. I've never much liked this crazy place, and the Bit Player isn't much of a boss, but I've seen you setting some of these bad acts straight, and I'm thinking maybe I could use a change of career. I don't suppose you could use an understudy, could you? No, I don't suppose understudy is the right word for your line of work. That's all I know right now, but I'm a fast learner. If you'll have me, maybe I can help?"
You get a full-time sidekick. (See your hideout for details.)
Your understudy says he/she/it goes by the name <name>, but if you've got a better nickname you can make up whatever you like.
You got an item: script page 6 
If you chose Incorrect roles:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The Bit Player eyes your costume and frowns. "No, no that is one of my roles! The Capulets are all mine! I shall not relinquish that part, you knave!" He proceeds to forcibly restrain you from attempting to perform the part, and he's none too gentle in the process.
or
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The Bit Player eyes your costume and frowns. "No, no that is one of my roles! The Montagues are all mine! I shall not relinquish that part, you knave!" He proceeds to forcibly restrain you from attempting to perform the part, and he's none too gentle in the process.
or
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. "Ah, one of the lovers. Such a great romantic part to play." The Bit Player eyes your costume and frowns. "But no, that is one of my roles! I was promised the women this week! I shall not relinquish that part, you knave!" He proceeds to forcibly restrain you from attempting to perform the part, and he's none too gentle in the process.
or
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. "Ah, one of the lovers. Such a great romantic part to play." The Bit Player eyes your costume and frowns. "But no, that is one of my roles! I was promised the men this week! I shall not relinquish that part, you knave!" He proceeds to forcibly restrain you from attempting to perform the part, and he's none too gentle in the process.
You lose Half your Max HP
If you chose No role:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. You've already guessed that character once. The Bit Player isn't going to go for it a second time.
Location(s)
Notes
- Occurs only during All the World's a Quest, and All the Men and Women Merely Heroes, after a script page was found in The Bit Player 6.
- Options you have already chosen in previous encounters with The Bit Player are removed from the list of available options.
- The 'correct roles' are different from player to player. See the pattern explain in The Bit Player 1.
- Becomes a One-time adventure once you get a script page. This also gives you the Basic understudy full-time sidekick.
- The <name> of your sidekick can be:
- Jenny Atomic (female)
- Jenny Exotic (female)
- Jenny Harmonic (female)
- Jenny Neurotic (female)
- Jenny Platonic (female)
- Jenny Plutonic (female)
- Jenny Robotic (female)
- Jenny Subsonic (female)
- Johnny Exotic (male)
- Johnny Mechanic (male)
- Johnny Phlegmatic (male)
- Johnny Plutonic (male)
- Jonatron Neurotic (neuter)
- Jonatron Platonic (neuter)
- Jonatron Protonic (neuter)
- Jonatron Theatric (neuter)