All-steel John Steele

all-steel John Steele

You are fighting the all-steel John Steele.

You open the door, finding yourself face-to-chest with Big J himself, John Steele.

He's bigger and badder, but also a lot more metal than before. He's got more chrome than your prime hot rod and probably got a few extra horses under his hood as well.

Despite the quality time you spent in his pizza establishment, he mostly seems interested in serving you up a slice of pain.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

• Steele tosses you into a stack of hero-crushing machinery. It seems to do a pretty good job.
• Steele bends a girder, then decides it's a great tool for killing all humans, starting with you.
• Steele headbutts you with his chrome noggin. KLONGGGGGG! damage + (sonic) damage

He hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

• Steele tosses you into a stack of hero-crushing machinery, but the machines are down for maintenance.
• Steele bends a girder, smiles, and bends another girder. He seems to be enjoying himself, so you leave him to it.
• Steele comes in for a headbutt, but you hit his head with a bent girder from the pile instead. KLONGGGGGG!

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 200 experience.

Huh, this gadget looks like a bit of cobbled-together trash, but whirs to life when your talisman gets near it... like it's drawing power from it somehow.

You have acquired a new skill: Crushing Hand

Known resistances/weaknesses

50% resistant to physical damage.
50% weak to acid damage.

Locations

• Hidden Factory
  

Notes

• At the end of each round of combat,

Massive pistons smash down on you (because factory, duh) but you fight against it with your rippling muscles until it withdraws back towards the ceiling.

Mr. Steele treats you to a demonstration of the Crushing Hand for X damage.

or

Massive pistons smash down on you (because factory, duh) and crush you for Y damage.

John Steele helps you out from under the pistons, yanking you out with his Crushing Hand for X damage. You were expecting a witty trash compactor joke, but apparently his sense of humor was removed along with all of his other organic parts.

References

• The second hit and miss messages refer to Bender from Futurama and his motto "Kill all humans!"