Matarkhis

matarkhis

You are fighting a matarkhis.

This a matarkhis. It's the very model of a modern Zion's Tears general. Doesn't really roll off the tongue, does it? No wonder it prefers warfare to musical theater.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

• He sings a few lines from his new script. You don't even think Bialystock and Bloom would be interested. damage + (sonic) damage
• Frustrated by a lack of success stabbing you, the matarkhis clouts you with a massive hammer. You decide it's better not to know where he's been keeping that.
• He sounds the horn at his belt, summoning an archon from down the hall to give you a couple good stabs.

It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

• He sings a few lines from his new script. You suggest he take it to Bialystock and Bloom.
• Frustrated by his lack of success stabbing you, the matarkhis goes looking for a massive hammer. By the time he finds it, it's already your turn again.
• He sounds the horn at his belt in a touching, but ultimately disastrous, attempt at redemption.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 68 experience.

You got an item: big honkin' hammer (19.1 ± 3%)
You got an item: shield of Zion (24.4 ± 3.2%)
You got an item: platinum necklace (48.6 ± 3.8%)
You got an item: horn of Zion (30.3 ± 3.5%)

Known resistances/weaknesses

50% resistant to sonic damage.
50% weak to electric damage.

Locations

• Zion's Tears building
  

References

• The description refers to the Major-General's Song from Gilbert and Sullivan's comic opera The Pirates of Penzance, which starts with the words "I am the very model of a modern Major-General".