The Bit Player 1
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Wandering around at the front of the house you run across a hunchbacked man wearing a complete mishmash of clothing, his arms laden with goods. He appears to be dressed so that breeches show from underneath a kilt, with one armored boot and one leather riding boot, and three or four shirts on in layers, covered by two cloaks. The hood is pulled up, but he wears a cap underneath. In his arms he carries a sword, a dagger, a staff, a vial of liquid, and several scrolls. You stop and stare at the guy quizzically, too dumbfounded at his unlikely array to do anything else.
The man notices your stare. He stops what he's doing and straightens, shedding all signs of the hunch and somehow going from appearing fairly short to standing surprisingly tall. "You must be new," he says in a light, fanciful tone, flashing a smile. Then his visage grows somber, and he mutters in a deep, heavy tone, "I'm the Bit Player. There's not enough budget to hire actors for all the roles, so I do all the little stuff, and all the roles nobody else wants." Suddenly his eyes grow shifty, and he eyes you suspiciously. "Who are you supposed to be, anyway?" he rasps.
- Bassanio
- Benvolio
- Beowulf
- Desdemona
- Gawaine
- Juliet
- Katherina
- Lady Capulet
- Mercutio
- Oberon
- Othello
- Petruchio
- Portia
- Titania
- Tybalt
- Robin Hood
- Romeo
Options:
- Benvolio, Desdemona, Katherina, Mercutio, Portia, Romeo, or Titania
- Gawaine, Beowulf, or Robin Hood
- Bassanio, Juliet, Lady Capulet, Oberon, Othello, Petruchio, or Tybalt
Results
If you chose Benvolio, Desdemona, Katherina, Mercutio, Portia, Romeo, or Titania:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The bit player smiles and nods, then claps you on the back. "Ah, such a role! One day I should be so lucky to play that part! Until then, lay on Macduff!" Whatever that means, it must be good, because the good-humored Bit Player visibly relaxes, then rushes off to some curtain call alert that you can't seem to detect.
Only after he's gone do you notice he's dropped a piece of parchment.
Depending on your specific choice:
Benvolio: You got an item: script page 7 
Desdemona: You got an item: script page 3
Mercutio: You got an item: script page 1
Portia: You got an item: script page 6
Romeo: You got an item: script page 4
Titania: You got an item: script page 2
If you chose Gawaine, Beowulf, or Robin Hood:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The Bit Player sputters at your suggestion. "An outrage! Have you no knowledge of the Bard at all? That's not even a Shakespearean role, you ignorant clod!" The Bit Player procedes[sic] to give his best effort to beating some sense into you.
- When you have already made two such choices:
- As the Bit Player strides off after trouncing you for your third pathetic guess, you realize that he left a can of unopened beverage behind. Must have been too busy slinging your butt all over the place to remember to pick it up afterwards. You play a short and very sweet game of finders keepers.
- You got an item: Scalpel energy drink
You lose Half your Max HP.
If you chose Bassanio, Juliet, Lady Capulet, Oberon, Othello, Petruchio, or Tybalt:
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Guessing a Bit
Nearly at a loss, you throw out the first name that you can come up with that might explain your odd garb. The bit eyes your costume and frowns. "No, no that is one of my roles! I shall not relinquish that part, you knave!" He procedes[sic] to forcibly restrain you from attempting to perform the part, and he's none too gentle in the process.
You lose Half your Max HP
Location(s)
Notes
- Occurs during All the World's a Quest, and All the Men and Women Merely Heroes.
- Becomes a One-time adventure once you get a script page.
- However, you get to meet the same character six more times. You need to get a script page each time to move to the next meeting.
- Each time you meet, options you have already chosen are removed from the list.
