Ironic bot

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Ironic-bot.gif
ironic bot

You are fighting an ironic bot.

This is a robot that was supposed to be delivered to a dry-cleaning business. Unfortunately, it was programmed by someone who mis-translated "ironer" as "ironic." As nobody really understands irony, this is one confused bot.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

  • "I'm gonna iron you!" it shouts in a strangely high-pitched and childish voice. Then it does. damage+ (fire) damage
  • The bot irons you, and then irons you some more. Isn't that a little too ironic, don't you think? Yes, I really do think. damage+ (fire) damage
  • It squishes you with a fabric press, but it's only rated for light pressure and doesn't hurt. When it releases, though, a metal corner catches and cuts you badly. Figures, huh?



It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.



Miss messages:

  • It presses you with one of its irons, but it turns out to be a cold iron. All it does is smooth out your clothes a little.
  • It searches its internal drawers for a knife to stab you with, but all it finds is spoon after spoon after spoon.
  • It blasts you with a bunch of scalding steam, but the steam cools before it actually reaches you. The humidity makes your hair go limp--doesn't that figure?



Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.


Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!


Chips-white.gif You gain 33-59 chips.

You gain 43 experience.

You got an item: data plate Data-plate.gif (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: electronic cabling Computer-cables.gif (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: mangled data plate Data-plate.gif (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: Inactive strobe drone Strobe.gif (Unspecified Drop rate)





Known resistances/weaknesses

Unspecified
Former resistances were Verified to have no resistances or weaknesses., remember to remove this information from the page when resistances are spaded.

Locations

Robot.gif This enemy is a robot with an electronic brain.