Catfish lawyer
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| catfish lawyer |
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You are fighting a catfish lawyer.
You get the joke here, right? One's a bottom-dwelling, cold-blooded scum sucker and the other's a fish.
Please don't sue me.
Your opponent attacks ...
Hit messages:
- He starts hounding you with a bunch of civil infractions that haven't been enforced for a hundred years and telling you how he'll see you hang. damage+ (sonic) damage
- He browbeats you (both literally and figuratively) for interrupting his routine.
- He slaps you with his legal briefs. Urgh. You didn't want to see that. damage+ (psychic) damage
He hits you for X damage.
Critical hit message:
Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.
Miss messages:
- He starts hounding you with a bunch of civil infractions, but you distract him with Go Away v. Who Cares.
- He tries to browbeat you for interrupting his day, but you offer him a cigar and a glass of scotch and he calms down, blaming his mad cow.
- He slaps you with his legal briefs. Luckily, they're just paper so it doesn't hurt.
Fumble messages:
Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.
Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!
You gain 93-154 chips.
You gain 123 experience.
You got an item: attache case 
(Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: chip loafers 
(Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: legal briefs 
(Unspecified Drop rate)
Known resistances/weaknesses
Unspecified
Former resistances were 50% resistant to sonic damage.
50% resistant to psychic damage., remember to remove this information from the page when resistances are spaded.