Brutish man

brutish man

You are fighting a brutish man.

"Hulking" doesn't begin to describe this figure. He's got muscles you've never heard of that are larger than your biceps. His weapon looks like it used to be a street lamp, or maybe a telephone pole.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

Brute smash. Brute smash good. Smash big. Brute smash ... you!
The brute drops his weapon onto his big toe. The subsequent roar of pain and anger drives you back into a wall and makes your head ring. damage+ (sonic) damage
Using his best hitter's stance, he steps up to an imaginary batter's box and just clobbers a home run. Did I mention you're the ball?

He hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! He hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

The brute approaches you with his weapon pulled back, but you taunt him with "Swing batter, batter swing!" and throw his timing off. His attack whooshes harmlessly in front of you.
The muscular figure tries to grab you, but his bulky muscles prevent him from pulling his arms together enough. You slip through as he struggles against himself.
Before he can attack, he's called in to testify at a congressional hearing on illegal steroid use.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! He takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 90-120 chips.

You gain 103 experience.

You got an item: tattered shorts (15.5 ± 2.5%)
You got an item: raccoon mask (11.4 ± 2.2%)
You got an item: lamp post (11.1 ± 2.2%)
You got an item: corrupt amulet (Semi-rare)