Plural: Fighting Clubs
You wouldn't think it's necessary, but this fancy club comes with its own ten-page manual. Weirdly, the first eight pages just have the same rule repeated over and over again. I'd tell you what it says, but I'm not really supposed to talk about it. There's some good stuff when you get to page nine, though, like a recipe for making the special soap you're supposed to use to keep the club clean.
The last page is crammed with diagrams explaining how to best use the club to make you a tougher, scrappier fighter. It's specific to the Fighting Club's unique design, but you think you could put it to good use.
June 2008 Item of the Month
Melee weapon (Bashing, small)
Item cannot be auto-sold
Item cannot be worn in runs with a 'no pulls' restriction
+X offense (+10/level, max: 100).
+10 Melee damage
+5% of weapon damage returned as HP
You do know Jack. Specifically, Jack's physiology.
- Available for 10 silver stars during June of 2008.
- When you hit a critical hit:
- You attack ... This is your club. This is your club on your opponent's pancreas. Through the Fighting Club, you glimpse Jack's raging bile duct, and know your opponent is in a great deal of pain. Any questions?
- You attack ... Your club strikes true on your opponent's chest, and you can almost see Jack's broken heart. Your opponent looks considerably weaker.
- You attack ... Wielding the club, you are Jack's smirking revenge. You strike a particularly nasty critical blow.
- Sometimes reduces some fire damage. You then get the message:
- Through the Fighting Club you channel Jack's cold sweat. The fire doesn't seem to burn so much.
- When a foe gets the first strike you get the message:
- Unfortunately, you're channeling Jack's daydream through your club instead of something useful, and your opponent acts first.
- The item's name, description, and attack messages all reference Fight Club.
|Item of the Month|
| Preceded by
| June 2008
| Succeeded by|
Plaid couch (extremely lumpy)