Servant robot

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servant robot

You are fighting a servant robot.

This humanoid robot has been programmed to protect you. However, its internal dictionary has become mangled, and the definition of "protect" that it's using doesn't quite match up with what you'd mean when you say that word. It's much closer to "destroy," as a matter of fact.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

  • Before the robot can attack, you quote the laws of robotics at it. It thinks for a second, shrugs, and then smashes you anyway.
  • It attempts to "serve" you, but there's a typo in the code so it attempts to "sever" instead.
  • The robot determines that you must be protected. It does so by pushing you down the stairs and shoving you into the snow.

It hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! It hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

  • The robot lunges for you, but loses balance and falls over. Sparks fly out from its midsection. A team of technicians rushes out from an alley, pulling a paper screen in front of the robot, and sets it upright again.
  • The robot chokes over a logical conflict between two competing missives. The pushing program refuses to trust the shoving program, and the shoving program ignores the pushing program. In the end the robot does nothing.
  • Just before the bot can serve up a heap of pain, the server crashes. You wait patiently as it reboots.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! It takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

Chips-white.gif You gain 12-20 chips.

You gain 27 experience.

You got an item: mangled data plate Data-plate.gif (10.8 ± 2.3%)
You got an item: electronic cabling Computer-cables.gif (19.2 ± 1.8%)
You got an item: titanium plating Titanium.gif (6.7 ± 1.1%)
You got an item: memory tube Memory-tube.gif (14.4 ± 1.6%)

Known resistances/weaknesses

100% weak to electric damage.


Robot.gif This enemy is a robot with an electronic brain.


  • The Servant Robot's portrait is taken from a photo of Asimo, a humanoid robot developed by Honda.
  • Some of the combat messages refer to the Three Laws of Robotics.