Crazy scientician

crazy scientician

You are fighting a crazy scientician.

When bad students with good minds fail out of accredited colleges and want to continue their research, their only choice is to enroll in a distance learning program in the field of Scientifics. This scientician has a concentration in Potent Potables, which she has taken at the 100, 200, and 300 levels thus far. She'll be taking Potent Potables 400--which meets twice daily--in the fall with Dr. A. Terbeck.
Your opponent attacks ...

Hit messages:

• The scientician whips out a portable electrifimometer and electrififies you with it. {{{2}}} (electric) damage
• Producing a pen and paper, she begins to convert you from English units to metric. You find the conversion to be a very painful process. (psychic) damage
• She quaffs a bubbling potion and quickly grows to double size, at which point she punts you into next Tuesday. PUNT!

She hits you for X damage.

Critical hit message:

Your opponent has a critical hit! She hits you for X damage.

Miss messages:

• She gulps down a can of some fizzing potion. For a moment, nothing happens. Then she belches loudly. Confused, the scientician looks at the can in her hand. "Gingerette?" she says. "How did that get in there?"
• The scientician shoots you with an inflamminator. If you had been on fire, it would have put it out, but as it is it does nothing.
• She hits you with 1500 kilograms of force. You point out that kilograms are mass and not force. Since F = ma, you define a to be a very small number, and all is fine.

Fumble messages:

Your foe fumbles! She takes X damage.

Victory! You beat up your foe and win the combat!

You gain 96-128 chips.

You gain 105 experience.

You got an item: de-enervation juice (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: embiggening tonic (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: lab coat (Unspecified Drop rate)
You got an item: caffeine pill (Unspecified Drop rate)

Known resistances/weaknesses

Unspecified

Locations

• Rooftops of downtown