Difference between revisions of "Cosmic jester"

What fools be we, mortals you and me, when caught by jest: tee-hee, tee-hee!

Level cap: 20

Full-time sidekick.
Obtained from: Rigoletto's Compleat Jester kit

Ability: Attacks, boosts spell damage, other benefits tuned by combat items

Messages

During combat the sidekick will sometimes attack, according to how it was tuned:

• Physical: <name> bops your opponent over the head with a rubber mallet. It seems innocent, but this rubber mallet is coated in lead. Your opponent takes X damage..^[sic]
• Psychic: <name> makes your opponent laugh until they cry, causing X (psychic) damage.
• Fire: <name> assautls^[sic?] your opponet^[sic?] with a barrage of flaming juggling pins, dealing X (fire) damage.
• Sonic: <name> sings loudly and badly off tune. You're used to it, but your opponent isn't. They take X (sonic) damage.
• Acid: <name> burns your opponent with a caustic wit X (acid) damage.
• Ice: <name> dumps a bucket of icewater down your opponent's back, pranking them for X (ice) damage.
• Electric: <name> utters a shockingly frank statement, as jesters are wont to do. Your opponent is shocked for X (electric) damage.

When you perform a damage spell:

<name> performs a magic trick, making a five-chip piece disappear and reappear someplace unexpected. The opening act makes your own skill appear all that much more impressive.

When tuned to Healing, sometimes at the end of combat:

<name> tells you a long and funny story about how he got this one scar. The story changes every time, and every time you laugh. Laughter, being the best medicine, gains you Y HP.

When tuned to MP-Restore, sometimes at the end of combat:

<name> swigs from a flask and staggers around drunkenly before proffering you the same flask. Hesitantly you take a sip, but it's just cold, refreshing water. You gain Z PP.

When tuned to XP, sometimes at the end of combat:

<name> gives an impromptu speech on the pompatus of love. Who better than a joker to speak deep truths? It's mostly confusing gibberish, but it's deep gibberish. You gain Q XP.

When tuned to Chips, sometimes at the end of combat:

Your jester sidekick does some acrobatics. Even defeated, your opponent is compelled by the motley fool's finery to cough up some more chips.

Notes

• Using some combat items gives a special message and tunes the sidekick:

When you produce the <item>, <name> grabs it, works it into a juggling routine, cavorting and saying <saying>

• A combat item doing elemental damage tunes the jester to do elemental damage. This tuning remains until a new item is used and changes the tuning.

• Items tuning to Physical damage show the saying: "The most kindest cut of all is a jest that will not scar."
• Items tuning to Psychic damage show the saying: "A wretched soul, bruised with adversity, shall all our foes be soon."
• Items tuning to Fire damage show the saying: "As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of crime with words. Real fire works much better."
• Items tuning to Sonic damage show the saying: "It is a tale told by a jester, full of sound and fury, signifying decibels."
• Items tuning to Acid damage show the saying: "He that is proud eats up himself; that substance right here eats up the foe."
• Items tuning to Ice damage show the saying: "For this comic relif much thanks: 't is bitter cold, and I am jesting at heart."
• Items tuning to Electric damage show the saying: "Come the villains of Twilight in arms, and we shall shock them: nought shall make us rue."

• In addition, some items will tune the jester to some bonus effect. This includes Healing, MP-Restore, Chips, Distracting, or XP. A bonus effect remains active for three hours, or until the jester is tuned to another bonus effect.

• Combat items which are not consumed when used are ignored.
• Combat items which come from Items of the Month may tune the jester's elemental attack, but they do not tune the special bonus.
• Other combat items which are ignored:

• bungee lasso
• deja voodoo doll
• drowsing rod
• flash powder
• holiday wreath
• Justin's magic wand
• lack of pies
• squidopus ink
• super-cute bunny

References

• The pompatus of love is a reference to Steve Miller's song "The Joker", which fits the jester.
• The description and combat messages contain references to plays by William Shakespeare.
  • The description refers to a quote by Puck in A Midsummer Night's Dream. "Lord, what fools these mortals be!"
  • The physical damage item message refers to a quote by Marcus Antonius in Julius Caesar. "This was the most unkindest cut of all"
  • The psychic damage item message refers to a quote by Adriana in The Comedy of Errors. "A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,/ We bid be quiet when we hear it cry."
  • The fire damage item message refers to quote by Julia in The Two Gentlemen of Verona. "Thou wouldst as soon go kindle fire with snow/ As seek to quench the fire of love with words."
  • The sonic damage item message refers to quote by Macbeth in Macbeth. "[I]t is a tale/ Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury/ Signifying nothing."
  • The acid damage item message refers to quote by Agamemnon in Troilus and Cressida. "He that is proud eats up himself"
  • The ice damage message refers to a quote by Francisco in Hamlet. "For this relief much thanks: 'tis bitter cold,/ And I am sick at heart."
  • The electric damage message refers to quote by the character known as The Bastard in The Life and Death of King John. "Now these her princes are come home again,/ Come the three corners of the world in arms,/ And we shall shock them. Nought shall make us rue,/ If England to itself do rest but true."