Cosmic jester

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Rakes-trowel.gif This page contains some non specific data which NEEDS SPADING:
Rakes-trowel.gif This page contains some non specific data which NEEDS SPADING:
Recheck all items that don't do damage - they are not supposed to tune to physical anymore


Cosmic jester

What fools be we, mortals you and me, when caught by jest: tee-hee, tee-hee!
Level cap: 20

How Obtained

Full-time sidekick.
Obtained from: Rigoletto's Compleat Jester kit


Ability: Attacks, boosts spell damage, other benefits tuned by combat items


During combat the sidekick will sometimes attack, according to how it was tuned:

  • Physical: <name> bops your opponent over the head with a rubber mallet. It seems innocent, but this rubber mallet is coated in lead. Your opponent takes X damage.
  • Psychic: <name> makes your opponent laugh until they cry, causing X (psychic) damage.
  • Fire: <name> assaults your opponent with a barrage of flaming juggling pins, dealing X (fire) damage.
  • Sonic: <name> sings loudly and badly off tune. You're used to it, but your opponent isn't. They take X (sonic) damage.
  • Acid: <name> burns your opponent with a caustic wit X (acid) damage.
  • Ice: <name> dumps a bucket of icewater down your opponent's back, pranking them for X (ice) damage.
  • Electric: <name> utters a shockingly frank statement, as jesters are wont to do. Your opponent is shocked for X (electric) damage.

When you perform a damage spell:

  • <name> performs a magic trick, making a five-chip piece disappear and reappear someplace unexpected. The opening act makes your own skill appear all that much more impressive.

When blocking your opponent:

  • <name> sings a bawdy song while pantomiming actions so suggestive your opponent can't really concentrate.

When tuned to Healing, sometimes at the end of combat:

  • <name> tells you a long and funny story about how he got this one scar. The story changes every time, and every time you laugh. Laughter, being the best medicine, gains you Y HP.

When tuned to PP-Restore, sometimes at the end of combat:

  • <name> swigs from a flask and staggers around drunkenly before proffering you the same flask. Hesitantly you take a sip, but it's just cold, refreshing water. You gain Z PP.

When tuned to XP, sometimes at the end of combat:

  • <name> gives an impromptu speech on the pompatus of love. Who better than a joker to speak deep truths? It's mostly confusing gibberish, but it's deep gibberish. You gain Q XP.

When tuned to Chips, sometimes at the end of combat:

  • <name> does some acrobatics. Even defeated, your opponent is compelled by the motley fool's finery to cough up X more chips.
  • <name> does some acrobatics, but your opponent doesn't even tip. Tough crowd.


  • As in the rest of Twilight Heroes, "Spell" refers to the damage-dealing powers of the Elemental and Psion classes.
  • Using some combat items gives a special message and tunes the sidekick:

When you produce the <item>, <name> grabs it, works it into a juggling routine, cavorting and saying <saying>

  • A combat item doing elemental damage tunes the jester to do elemental damage. This tuning remains until a new item is used and changes the tuning.
    • Items tuning to Physical damage show the saying: "The most kindest cut of all is a jest that will not scar."
    • Items tuning to Psychic damage show the saying: "A wretched soul, bruised with adversity, shall all our foes be soon."
    • Items tuning to Fire damage show the saying: "As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of crime with words. Real fire works much better."
    • Items tuning to Sonic damage show the saying: "It is a tale told by a jester, full of sound and fury, signifying decibels."
    • Items tuning to Acid damage show the saying: "He that is proud eats up himself; that substance right here eats up the foe."
    • Items tuning to Ice damage show the saying: "For this comic relif much thanks: 't is bitter cold, and I am jesting at heart."
    • Items tuning to Electric damage show the saying: "Come the villains of Twilight in arms, and we shall shock them: nought shall make us rue."
    • (currently unknown): "Nothing can come of nothing: combat again, or hold thy element."
  • In addition, some items will tune the jester to some bonus effect. This includes Healing, PP-Restore, Chips, Distracting, or XP. A bonus effect remains active for three hours, or until the jester is tuned to another bonus effect.
Item <item> Tunes to
atomic wedge wedge Physical
badly bent knife knife Physical
ball o' fire ball o' fire Fire
band-aid band-aid Healing
bandolier bandolier Physical
bent paperclip bent paperclip Psychic, Blocks
big rock rock Physical
black card black card Psychic
bubble wrap bubble wrap Sonic
cashmere yarn cashmere yarn Blocks
clamp of stairvoyance clamp Physical
combat paperclip paperclip Physical or Blocks
corroded battery grenade corroded battery grenade Electric
cracked nut shells cracked nut shells Physical
crystal for scrying out loud crystal for scrying out loud Sonic
degausser degausser Physical
disposable instant camera camera Psychic, XP
ectoplasmic bowling ball ectoplasmic bowling ball Ice
ectoplasmic chains ectoplasmic chains Ice
ectoplasmic glove ectoplasmic glove Ice
ectoplasmic pumpkin ectoplasmic pumpkin Ice
EMP device EMP device Physical, Blocks
endless handkerchief endless handkerchief Blocks
enerbun globule enerbun globule Physical
explosive briefing explosive briefing Fire
extendable hand extendable hand Chips
fire bladder fire bladder Fire
fizzler fizzler Fire
flash-restore capsule flash-restore capsule Healing
foul fowl foul fowl Acid
freeze frame freeze frame Ice, XP
frowny sticker sticker Psychic
fruitcake fruitcake Physical
frusion speck frusion speck PP-Restore
goat horns goat horns Sonic, Blocks
gross bag gross bag Acid
hands-free pan hands-free pan Fire
holiday wreath holiday wreath Blocks
ichor ichor Acid
ion ion Electric, PP-Restore
insta-salve, small, insta-salve, large salve Healing
insta-charge ampoule ampoule PP-Restore
Justin's magic wand Justin's magic wand Psychic or Healing
kablammo kabomb kablammo kabomb Physical
letter of pre-recognition letter Fire, XP
lip blam lip blam Fire
magic deck of cards magic deck of cards Blocks
memory box box Psychic, XP
Mister Ick-er sticker Mister Ick-er sticker Acid
pan handle pan handle Chips
power pak pak Electric
pun gas pun gas Physical, Blocks
rank bun rank bun Physical, Blocks
razor dove razor dove Physical
really big shoe really big shoe Physical
recognizer bot recognizer bot (currently unknown)
refound marbles refound marbles Physical
road flare road flare Fire
roman candle wand roman candle wand Fire
scorched coffee coffee Fire
shocker pen pen Electric, Blocks
sleet bucket bucket Ice
snowball snowball Ice
sour coating coating Acid
spark plug spark plug Electric
sparkle bomb sparkle bomb Fire
sparkler sparkler Fire
specter snare snare Ice, Healing
squidopus ink squidopus ink Blocks
the bomb the bomb Physical
throwing star - black hole throwing star - black hole Psychic
throwing star - blue giant throwing star - blue giant Ice
throwing star - magnetar throwing star - magnetar Electric
throwing star - pulsar throwing star - pulsar Sonic
throwing star - red dwarf throwing star - red dwarf Fire
Ticketmaster's ticket punch ticket[sic?] Physical, XP
TNT TNT Physical, Blocks
webbed sand webbed sand Blocks


  • The pompatus of love is a reference to Steve Miller's song "The Joker", which fits the jester.
  • The description and combat messages contain references to plays by William Shakespeare.
    • The description refers to a quote by Puck in A Midsummer Night's Dream. "Lord, what fools these mortals be!"
    • The physical damage item message refers to a quote by Marcus Antonius in Julius Caesar. "This was the most unkindest cut of all"
    • The psychic damage item message refers to a quote by Adriana in The Comedy of Errors. "A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,/ We bid be quiet when we hear it cry."
    • The fire damage item message refers to quote by Julia in The Two Gentlemen of Verona. "Thou wouldst as soon go kindle fire with snow/ As seek to quench the fire of love with words."
    • The sonic damage item message refers to quote by Macbeth in Macbeth. "[I]t is a tale/ Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury/ Signifying nothing."
    • The acid damage item message refers to quote by Agamemnon in Troilus and Cressida. "He that is proud eats up himself"
    • The ice damage message refers to a quote by Francisco in Hamlet. "For this relief much thanks: 'tis bitter cold,/ And I am sick at heart."
    • The electric damage message refers to a quote by the character known as The Bastard in The Life and Death of King John. "Now these her princes are come home again,/ Come the three corners of the world in arms,/ And we shall shock them. Nought shall make us rue,/ If England to itself do rest but true."
    • The (currently unknown) message refers to a quote by the title character in King Lear. "Nothing will come of nothing. Speak again."
  • The end-of combat healing message refers to The Joker's contradictory tales of how he got his scars in the movie The Dark Knight.