Feeding Goats

• To be able to feed the goats you need to use instant goats. This adds the Box of Goats to your Workbench.
• Goats start with a Calorie level of zero. Feeding them an item raises their Calorie level.
• The number of Calories gained is equal to the autosell value.
  • Items with "green" as part of their name give double their autosell value in calories.
• Every item that can be digitized can be fed to the goats. See details there.
• They produce a wad of cashmere for each 250 Calories they consume.
• The goats' mood reflects the special item they're closer to yielding in parallel with cashmere production:

Curious if they have yet to be fed any item that contributes to any special item;

Saccharine when closer to producing mint goat milk due to having been fed sugar or sugar/caffeine hybrid items;

Jittery when closer to producing goat latte due to having been fed caffeine items;

Angry when closer to producing goat horns due to having been fed Ranged or Melee weapon items;

Playful when closer to producing goat's eye marble due to having been fed combat items;

Haughty when closer to producing golden cashmere fleece due to having been fed high value items;

Distressed when closer to producing bezoar due to having been fed hard to digest items;

• High value items consist of items with "gold" as part of their name and items with an autosell higher than 300 excluding those that already trigger other special items.
• Hard to digest items include all defensive equipment with a power equal to or greater than 100.
• The goats' hungriness has no known effect on the amount of items produced.
• The Box of Goats Calorie level is reset to zero with every new Retcon run.

Box of Goats

You are the proud owner of a box of goats. They look (curious/saccharine/jittery/angry/playful/haughty/distressed) and (a little queazy from rehydrating... but still quite hungry/hungry... mostly hungry/hungry/a little hungry/inexplicably still hungry).

So, you should be careful about what you leave laying around near the box, because if the goats get ahold of it, it'll be gone forever.

---

Drop in the following items:
<List of items and Calorie units>
quantity: #
all
all but one
[ Toss it in! ]

Messages

• Adding an item:
  

You place the X <item> in the box of goats. The goats take turns standing on your offering for a while, then eventually get hungry and eat it bite by bite. Wow, they really will eat all sorts of crazy stuff.

• Adding an item with "green" on the name, in addition to the previous message:
  

Man, they really seem to love <item>!

• Trying to add more of an item than you have:
  

You don't have as many of those items as you'd like to feed your goats. You're trying to give them X, but you only have Y.

• When they've consumed enough Calories to produce cashmere, you'll get one of the following messages:

When the goats haven't had enough to produce cashmere:

It doesn't look like your goats are ready for harvesting yet.

When the goats have had enough to produce 1 wad of cashmere:

Once they've finished eating, you notice your goats have produced a bit of cashmere.

When the goats have had enough to produce 2 wads of cashmere:

Once they've finished eating, you notice your goats could use a quick shave. And a hair cut. Two bits.

When the goats have had enough to produce 3 or more wads of cashmere:

Once they've finished eating, you notice your goats have produced a handsome crop of cashmere.

You got an item: X wads of cashmere

Special Items' Messages

These messages show up after the ones in the previous section.

• When feeding them X*200 Calories worth of sugar and sugar/caffeine hybrid items, you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

One of the goats offers you some green milk. Huh.

When cashmere was produced:

While you're down there, you collect some tasty looking goat milk.

You got an item: X glasses of mint goat milk

• When feeding them X*200 Calories worth of caffeine items, you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

One of the goats starts screaming, a sound eeriely reminiscent of a tea kettle. You quickly milk it, before all the steam leaks out.

When cashmere was produced:

While you're down there, a scalding hot liquid splashes against you. Ooo, goat latte!

You got an item: X goat lattes

• When feeding them X*1000 Calories worth of weapons, you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

Huh. There are some goat horns at the bottom of the pen. You do a quick check to make sure none of the goats are missing theirs, but everyone looks fine. Huh.

When cashmere was produced:

Huh. There are some goat horns at the bottom of the pen. You hope you didn't knock those off by accident, but a quick check verifies none of the goats are missing theirs.

You got an item: X sets of goat horns

• When feeding them X*200 Calories worth of combat items, you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

Once they finish eating, you challenge them to a quick game of marbles and walk away with one. Score!

When cashmere was produced:

You're not really sure when the goats took up shooting marbles, but they abandoned (one/some) when they went to eat. Finder's keepers.

You got an item: X goat's eye marbles

• When feeding them X*1000 Calories worth of high value items (list above), you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

Wow! Your goats look like they could head out to the yacht club. You give them a quick shave before they get too pretentious.

When cashmere was produced:

Wow! Some of this looks like gold!

You got an item: X golden cashmere fleeces

• When feeding them X*1000 Calories worth of hard to digest items (list above), you'll get:

When no cashmere was produced:

As you're feeding the goats, you notice some rocks down at the bottom of the box. One of the goats must have coughed them up, so there's no way you're going to pick...

When cashmere was produced:

There are also some rocks down here. One of the goats must have coughed them up, so there's no way you're going to pick...

You got an item: X bezoars

Okay, fine, just this once.

References

• The message when harvesting two wads of cashmere contains a reference to the short musical riff "Shave and a Haircut".