Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks
Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks
Plural: Professor Ouch's satchels of tricks
Professor Ouch was a b-list villain (and around here, that's really saying something) who wanted nothing more than to ruin the good, innocent fun of International Joke Day. To that end, he created a bunch of items that look like mere prankery, but are actually dangerous items. While they're no Bag O Glass, they certainly aren't good for children.
However, you're a wise superhero, and using this satchel of dangerous toys as a weapon against the Forces Of Evil™ appeals to your sense of irony. Or is it poetic justice? Ever since that stupid song, I've never been quite sure about the definition of irony any more. Which is pretty ironic.
Right?
August 2012 Item of the Month
Offhand Item
Power: 10
Item cannot be auto-sold
{{#vardefine:consumable|no}}{{#vardefine:consumable|{{#var:consumable}}}}Usable
Item cannot be worn in runs with a 'no pulls' restriction
+3% item drops
How Obtained
- Available for 10 silver stars during August of 2012.
Have a Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks (empty) in your inventory on rollover.
When Used
You dump out the satchel, revealing an assortment of "jokes."
- You got an item: Ouch's bike horn
or - You got an item: Ouch's clown make-up
or - You got an item: Ouch's foam brick
or - You got an item: Ouch's head arrow
or - You got an item: Ouch's joy buzzer
or - You got an item: Ouch's lovely flower
or - You got an item: Ouch's stink bomb
or - You got an item: Ouch's trick cards
The satchel seems a little less threatening now.
You got an item: Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks (empty) 
Notes
- When bought: The shopkeeper hands you a sack filled with dirty tricks, then offers to shake your hand. You know better than to accept it.
References
- The description contains a reference to a Saturday Night Live skit in which sleazy entrepreneur Irwin Mainway, played by Dan Aykroyd, sold dangerous toys such as a "Bag O Glass".
- The description contains a reference to the song "Ironic" by Alanis Morissette.
| Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks (empty) | |
|---|---|
| Item | Effect |
| Ouch's bike horn | Combat Item Sonic damage Stuns for 1 round |
| Ouch's clown make-up | Ends combat without time Clowning Inside Take 2 psychic damage per round of combat |
| Ouch's foam brick | Combat Item Stuns for 3 rounds |
| Ouch's head arrow | Martin'd Increased chance of combat adventures |
| Ouch's joy buzzer | Combat Item Electric damage Stuns for 1 round |
| Ouch's lovely flower | Combat Item Acid damage Stuns for 1 round |
| Ouch's stink bomb | Personal Funk Increased chance of noncombat adventures |
| Ouch's trick cards | Combat Item Damage |
| Item of the Month | ||
|---|---|---|
| Preceded by Spy tux |
August 2012 Professor Ouch's satchel of tricks |
Succeeded by Twilight Inventions 800 |